Synopsis of a Phrase: You Don’t Know What You Have Until It’s Gone

“You don’t know what you have until it’s gone” Like an old saying “You don’t know what you have until it’s gone”. For some people these are just words, but for others it’s really more a life changing phrase. To me this phrase are more than just words. I question myself every time I see or hear about mother’s abandoning their children’s. I really can’t understand what come across their minds to make a life changing decision. Every woman who has the blessing of having children’s should be grateful, because not every woman has the glory of giving birth.

I can’t comprehend leaving behind a part of you like if it didn’t exist, that is just outrages. But then again life in some way or somehow it comes back and haunts you, it’s all about karma. This is where the old saying of “You don’t know what you have until it’s gone”, kicks in then it’s too late to try to regain what you had back then. As I grew up as a teenager I always had in mind that I wanted to have a boy first and then a girl as my own children. Well, God heard my wishes and made them true, but not knowing that later on in my life I was going to wish that I hadn’t made that petition.

I had my son at age 17 and my daughter at age 19, years passed by and simply no more pregnancies came along. I was divested as well as my husband we wanted to have more family. Apparently it just wasn’t going to happen I was diagnosed with PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome). The possibilities of getting pregnant were between 2% to 5% which let’s be honest, “Not enough”. Pretty much I become infertile, but I had set my mind if these are Gods wish let them be. I was already so grateful in having my two kids. I’m not going lie I still had that wish of becoming mother again back in mind.

I have a sister who had a beautiful daughter two years ago. I was hoping for my sister to change for good, since she was more into going out with friends, boyfriends, and anything relate to being irresponsible. The first year seemed to be okay even though she still went out. In the beginning of the second year she started to complain about having her daughter. She would say, “I wish I have never had you”. How can she possibly say this, she is only an “innocent little girl” who didn’t ask to be brought to this world. I spoke to my mother about this situation.

I simply couldn’t let this go on. My mother said, “I will not let this happen again”. My mother did actually speak to my sister, she obviously didn’t like that so she called me up and said, “I’m leaving the house and I’m giving the baby away to someone”. I said “No you are not”! Give her to me, I said. My sister answers back by saying, “Well, come for her now or I will give her away”. So I eagerly left to my mother’s house. I had to tell my sister, that I hope you never ever regret what you are doing. This is when I brought up the old saying, “You don’t know what you have until it’s gone”.

Some day you will be begging for the forgiveness of your daughter and this is when you will realize that what you did was wrong and it will be to late. At the end I tried to understand why she took this decision. What was going thru her mind? I just can come with an answer. I’ve tried every possible method of getting pregnant and here she comes and leaves her daughter like nothing as if she never carried her in her stomach for 9 months. By the way I was present in the baby’s birth. It was wonderful reliving the moment when I gave birth to my children.

Now I’m going thru the moment of seeing my niece being abandoned by her insensitive mother. This really breaks my heart by seeing my little niece looking for her mother and not finding her. To me this kind of people should not have the blessing of being a mother, if in some way you can call them mothers. While other women try and wish they could be mothers. We should have more conscious in what we do and the consequence that later in life will bring us. We should treasure what we currently have and not wait until it’s too late to realize what slip away from our hands. Life is to short to make wrong decisions.