Sameness and Difference Does Not Matter
Sameness and difference does not matter if there is belonging Belonging is a key in managing effective relationships. When you belong somewhere or amongst a group of people, sameness or difference does not come into play as you are considered an equal. Nevertheless there should be somewhat sameness between the entire groups, so that there is a common similarity that connects the entire group together. Though the very notion that there could exist a place where difference does not count may seem ludicrous to some people but unless you’ve experienced true belonging, it is a difficult concept to put into words.
Accepting and being accepted for your differences is critical in the subject of belonging and once past that critical stage your sameness and difference becomes irrelevant, now that you belong somewhere or amongst something. Sameness is the primary attitude needed to belong with either a group of individuals or a collection of groups. That sameness may be in physical form eg: Skin Colour, height, weight, physique etc.
In this case, those African American people that had been poorly treated and subjected to nothing but being treated like second class citizens, due to the implementation of the Jim Crow laws in the southern states of the United States of America. Sameness not only exists on the outside of an individual, but also what’s on the inside of oneself and it could be religious beliefs, values, intellect and their take on what is wrong and what is right. Having the same religion as a fellow individual could help you belong, same goes for having similar values and believing in what is right and wrong.
To further this idea, if you look around many of the friendships/relationships that occur, occur because individuals share a common or genuine similarity, hence being able to socialise and communicate properly, thus suggesting that it does matter that there needs to be sameness, however minimal, to belong In the “Member of the Wedding”. Berenice and Frankie have about being “loose” or “caught” in the world. Berenice says that we are caught in the sense that we are born black or white and cannot change that.
Being a black woman, she knows that her colour traps her even more because of discrimination. Frankie sees how at the same time we are lost in our community because of our failure to connect or mix with other people and belonging. This moment serves as a powerful statement against the separation of the races and makes a pledge for unity, but ultimately coming to the conclusion that is does matter that that you need sameness to belong. Similarities are needed to develop and maintain a healthy relationship as both parties share something in common.
However, that relationship or that need to belong could be overshadowed if there weren’t for a couple of differences that distinguishes the person from another. In going through the process of belonging, one must be able to display both similarities and differences in order to belong. However once that stage is reached, there is no need to show either a similarity or a difference as you become considered an equal among whom or the place in which you belong. Sameness and differences is not needed if there is belonging. However, they are needed to form that special bond which is belonging.
Nobody is going to play the fool by saying that everyone is going to have a special link with each other despite the fact that they aren’t going to display their sameness or differences because that is simply not true. To belong is something everybody craves but not everyone does achieve that and it is only when you reach the highest stage that your attributes are no longer needed as the place where you belong has seen it all. Belonging is just not a want, but a need. We see people fly everywhere to discover the true meaning of belonging but unless you’ve experienced it, then it shall remain a mystery to those yet to discover it.
