Mother and Parent
The Ideal Parent: Brightening a Childs Future Parenting is a big part of every ones lives; it makes up who you are as a person and in many cases projects who you will be in the future. Some adults have trouble manipulating their children and teaching them what is right from wrong, while others have a much easier time doing so. In my opinion there is no such thing as “the perfect parent”, both the mother and the father have their flaws, but what matters is that the parent is always there for personal support.
To me a good parent is someone who is always there to support there children in both good and bad terms, and a responsible adult that can supply for their kids necessities, not necessarily all the luxuries that they want. Another key point to being a good parent is to be a good leader, all kids look up to their parents and most of the time follow their parents footsteps and part of being a good leader is being a hard worker. A parent that is supportive, responsible, and a leader and hard worker all make up to be a great parent in my opinion.
In the stories Scar by Amy Tan, My Fathers Hands by Daisy Hernandez, and the poems by Robert Hayden, No Longer a Teenager by Gerald Locklin all tie up to the universal theme of good parenting. Even though some characters in the story struggle to be the perfect parent they desire to be, some are successful in doing so while others just cannot do their duty. Having support from a parent is a corner stone in a kids life growing up, without the support of their closest relative life can be a struggle growing up. In the poem No Longer a Teenager, Gerald Locklin narrates, literature and opera are full of characters who die for love: i stay alive for her. ” (35-37) The father implies that unconditionally of the situation he will always be there to support and give love to his daughter. In this poem love and support is a big theme, showing the strong bond between the father and the daughter still after her teenage years gives a great amount of respect to the father. Supporting children from a very young age can definitely shape up the future of a young kid. On the other hand in the story Scar by Amy Tan, “I felt unlucky that she was my mother and unlucky that she had left us.
These were the thoughts I had while hiding in the corner of my room where my father could not watch me” (292). An-mei the main character had no support from her mother growing up as she abandoned her own family and kids. The author Tan states this in a way that the child almost feels lonely, dull, and unhappy, which can be the outcome of no parental support. The different mindsets of the parents are well established, one parent has been there to support their kid since birth while the other one was there for a couple of years and then abandoned her child.
This plays a big role in these kids mind because not having the support they need can be the difference between love and shame in a parent-child relationship. Next, responsibility is one thing most parents try to educate their kids about as they are growing up. Having a responsible parent can be the difference between having a good, comfortable childhood, and having a rough, complicated life growing up. In the poem “Those Winter Sundays” by Robert Hayden “Speaking indifferently to him. who had driven out the cold and polished my good shoes as well” (10-13) shows a great level of responsibility from the dad.
Getting up early to do all the necessary for the child to have a nice easy morning makes his kid life much easier and happier. Taking responsibilities for their kids and their own personal lives can benefit both the parent and child in the long run. On the contrary in the story “My fathers Hands” by Daisy Hernandez, the child in the story has more of a complicated and rough childhood. “I’d get home and change from my catholic uniform to my McD’s one. If I worked enough hours, I made as much as my mother did at the factory”(412) states Hernandez. This quote illustrates the more complicated version of a very young teenage girl.
The father is un-employed and the mother is making the same amount as her teenage daughter. This shows a lack of responsibility coming from both parents because at this age the parents should be concerned about the daughter going to school and both parents should have a job accounted for. The irresponsibility’s of the parents can affect a child from a young age, not only does it complicates the life of the kid, but the parents do a poor job of teaching a child the values of being responsible. One parent shows responsibilities for their kids while the other parent shows no remorse for her daughter.
Finally, being a leader and a hard worker not only in your children’s lives but also in society is what makes a huge difference between a great parent and a mediocre parent. Showing a child the values of leadership and hard work can make a kids future that much better. A parent that holds these two characteristics and is able to put them to use in society will not only be a great example for their kids, but a superb example of a great parent. In the poem “Those Winter Sundays”, Hayden illustrates the hard work and leadership this father puts in for the family to have a nice comfortable living. Sundays too my father got up early and put his clothes on in the blueblack cold, then with cracked hands that ached from labor in the weekday weather made banked fires blaze. No one ever thanked him. ” (1-5) This stanza shows the fathers hard work, he worries about the family and the kid and wants noting but the best for them. Hayden states that the father works and serves the family seven days a week, making him a superb father figure and even though the family members do not appreciate everything he does for the family he is doing a good deed.
Unlike the mother in “Scar” by Tan she was never much of a leader to her daughter or son. “Who is this ghost?….. If you take your daughter, she will become like you. No face. Never able to lift up her head”(294). This line emphasizes the fact that the mother was never there as a parental figure, in a way she is a disgrace to her daughter because she never taught her the meanings of life and was never there to support her daughter and be a leader for her daughter.
Tan states under the surface that it is better for her to leave her daughter behind because she did not race her and they both have different moral beliefs. She cannot be a leader to her daughter and from a child’s point of view not having a leader to follow and grow up with can make a child dread of unhappiness. One parent does the right thing to serve their family and be a leader and a hard working parent to teach their kids about life, while the other parent was never really there to even talk to the child.
In conclusion, having a parental figure guide a child through life by showing them key characteristics and the essence of life will benefit the child much more. The characteristics that a great parent should have is to support the children at all times, be a responsible adult, and be a leader and demonstrate hard workmanship so the kid can follow ones foot steps and continue thriving through life. No parent is perfect but most parents have what it takes to be a successful parental icon in their child’s life.
Works Cited
- Badillo, Jose, and Mrs. Fay Lee. “Scar. ” : By Amy Tan. 1302 Composition and Rhetoric II, 24 Sept. 2009.
- Web. 06 Mar. 2013. Gerald Locklin. “The Writer’s Almanac with Garrison Keillor. ” No Longer A Teenager by Gerald Locklin. The Writers Almanac, 18 July 2002.
- Web. 06 Mar. 2013. Hayden, Robert. “Those Winter Sundays. ” – Poets. org. Academy Of American Poets, 23 May 1966.
- Web. 06 Mar. 2013. Hernandez, Daisy. “My Father’s Hands A« Daisy Hernandez. ” Daisy Hernandez. Daisy Hernandez, 13 July 2005.
- Web. 06 Mar. 2013.
