Genogram Paper

In the midst of memories within a person’s childhood, one cannot truly find out everything at a young age. Using a genogram however, allows me to figure out more about my family. Surprisingly, I found out so much about my roots that I never knew before. I also noticed a few health patterns and relationships I never knew where there. Nevertheless, I wanted to include my cousins but that would take more time and a few more paper. Let me take you on my journey in finding out what’s within my family. So I begin with my grandparents from both my mother and father’s side.

My grandparents from my mother’s side both are in heaven. Interestingly enough they both passed on the 17th which is interesting; they were also a few years apart in age! I asked my mother if my grandparents had ancestors from places other than Dominican Republic; she stated my grandfather’s mother was Puerto Rican, and their parents migrated from Spain. Both of my grandparents had a lot of health issues. They both have had a history of asthma and problems breathing. My grandmother had more than one issue with her health. She had skin cancer and never attended to it.

My grandmother was close with all of her nieces and nephews. I was really close with her and she was one of the people who inspired me with school. They eventually migrated to the United States but had all of their children in the Dominican Republic. My grandparents from my father’s side still live in the Dominican Republic. My grandfather was lucky enough to live as old as 93. He passed away due to old age. My grandmother is my only grandmother I have left and I wish I had more of a connection with her like I did with my mother’s grandmother. I feel it is due to the distance and not enough time spent together.

In addition, my grandmother is 78 now and is almost 20 years apart from my grandfather. My grandparents in the Dominican Republic have lived longer that my grandparents from my mother’s side. Both of my grandfather’s suffered from high blood pressure issues. There are few similarities I have noticed within the first and second generation in my family. For instance, everyone is Catholic. My brother is an Atheist, my sister now being baptized for Christianity, and me questioning the religions of the world. Another example is everyone being Dominican and being born and raised in that country.

Majority of my aunts and uncles including my parents are married and still are married. Let’s move on to the second-generation portion of my genogram. My grandparents from my mother’s side had 11 kids. My grandparents from my father’s side had 6 children. My family, as I now realize, is really big. From my mother’s sisters, one of my aunts, I never got to meet because my grandmother lost her due to miscarriage. Amazingly enough, my other aunt named my cousin after her (Ivelisse). My mother is the youngest of the 11 children my grandmother had.

My father is the middle child from his mother’s children; I feel this is why my father and I understand each other more compared to my mother. 7 of the 11 children from my mother’s siblings have the same genetics; by this I mean they all look alike in the face. One of my aunts passed away a few months ago in the summer due to asthma and other lung related problems. My other aunt, second youngest sibling from my mother’s side helped raised my siblings and I with her 5 children. 2 of the 11 siblings my mother has is having issues with asthma and high blood pressure; my mother is dealing with these health issues as well.

My uncle, the oldest of the 11 siblings, along with my mother are the only ones with a college degree. Everyone else only completed high school and began working shortly after. From my father’s side, everyone but one of my Aunts was the only one to finish her college degree. Everyone else only completed high school. My father and her are the only ones that moved to the United States. My father’s genetics are similar to all of his siblings; you can actually tell and would think they are six-tuplets by one look in the face. My father and my aunt with the college degree are the only ones married out of the 6.

She was a nun before she went to school and I have an uncle from my father’s brothers who is a well-known priest in the Dominican Republic. The second-generation family from my father’s side is actually not as close and very distant from my siblings and I. I have one aunt that inspires the free spirit I have; we act exactly alike and look alike surprisingly. One of my aunts from my father’s sisters has been recently diagnosed with Breast cancer. She is now in chemotherapy and has only 24 months to live. It has taken a huge toll on my family.

The expenses have become really tight, and I have noticed a frequent pattern when people in my family become ill. Since my parents make the most money from both sides, both families rely on them to provide most if not all the money for any expenses. This brings me to my parents who have been marriage for 29 years. They had 3 beautiful children. I have a younger brother who is 20 and an older sister who is 25. I am 23, which makes us all 2-3 years apart from each other. I am the middle child and the one with the most motivation to continue school out of the 2 siblings I have.

My sister and brother look alike and look just like my mother. I did notice however, I do have my mother’s smile. Out of the 3 my health issues are most related to my grandmother and mother who has had heart and problems with asthma. I am the only left-handed person in my whole family with the exception of my cousin from my mother’s side. My brother is considered to be the smartest child in my family, however, takes his time with school. My sister does not live with us because she married at the age of 19. She now lives in Tennessee and has a child named Mya who is four.

I have a close relationship with Mya; I am basically fused with her and she makes my day. My mother also states that we look alike when I was little and she has the same high-pitched scream. My sister also has a longhaired Chihuahua who is 3 years old. My brother had a close but short relationship with my grandfather from my mother’s side. My sister is close with my father; but I feel it is only because she is the first born. My parents even though married for so long, have marital issues that are hostile. My mother has high expectations where my father has a relaxed idea of living life.

My parents are also extremely strict; the rules they have had however, caused us 3 to rebel. My brother, my sister and I support each other a lot. I am the only one that I know is bi-sexual in my family. Similar to my grandmother, I had a miscarriage in the year 2009. The relationship my mother and I have is a love and hate thing; which leaves me closed to talk about my sexual history or sex in general. She did inspire me to work hard in everything I do and introduced me to psychology for my career. However, my brother and mother have a hostile relationship due to her expectation with school.

My sister and I, along with my 4 cousins from my aunt (2nd oldest from my mother’s sisters), have a torn relationship with my uncle (3rd youngest from my mother’s siblings). My uncle used to live with my grandmother. He was my favorite uncle; I remember throwing for him because I knew he never celebrated. What I failed to realize at such a young age was that he sexually abused me along with my sister and female cousins. We all met for a sleepover at my house and reminisced about childhood memories and his name was brought up.

I later than spoke with my mother about the situation and my mother completely ignored or was in denial that it occurred. She also stated that it was common for things like that to happen in the Dominican Republic. This is when I knew she would never understand nor take my side because that was her brother. She still wanted me to say hi to him after everything he has done. This is where the family dynamic stands. It is not that I wanted her to take my side; however, I wanted her protection regardless if he was related to us. Since my grandmother passed, my mother cut off her other brother completely and the family shifted.

My mother does not speak to her sister who helped raised us do to her inconsistent motherly behavior. In my family, the pattern for parents was to work. For example, it breaks the stereotype that wives only stay home and take care of the house and children. There are a few things I have noticed. For one, the relationship between families have been somewhat slaughtered due to traumatic events. Another is that family members rely too much on each other, which then affects the newest members or the new generation to come. My mother has taken on the role my grandmother had; causing her to have a lot of stress on top of the daily issues at home.

Overall, the similarities and memories bring us together. My family is big and is growing more almost every year. Although there are issues, we manage to pull through somehow. With the 3rd generation, there are many differences due to the environment and the society we were associated with in comparison to the 1st and 2nd generation. In addition there is a family secret about my grandparent’s from my mother’s side owning land somewhere. I’m willing to look into that more. Even though my family has so many issues, there is so much more exploring, much more establishing of relationships and new generations to be created.