Example of Criticising a Translation
The source language text (SLT) is a journalistic news report. It attempts to inform the reader about a certain event. On the other hand, The target language text (TLT) is weak, and it’s obvious that the translating process has been done using a translation machine AL WAFI that upholds word-for-word translation. The target language text (TLT) reads foreign. as well as, it’s difficult to be understood, it does not flow smoothly and does not have a natural feel due to the lexical, grammatical, and textual errors that are detected in the text. In the target language text (TLT), there are many lexical errors have been detected.
First, the lexical item in the first paragraph does not collocate with since in the Arabic language the word collocates with, and the word are used to collocate with kings and queens. There is another lexical error detected in the text associated with equivalence. The lexical item “concern” means in Arabic, but in this context, it should have been translated, while the translation machine service AL WAFI has disregarded the context in which the lexical item appears in and opted only one meaning for the lexical item “situation”. There are also grammatical errors that are detected in the text. The first error associated with the word order in the first paragraph, where an obligatory structure shift should have been taken place since in the Arabic language we start the sentence with the verb, and the word order is (VSO) different from the English language. So the translator machine should have started with the verb, not with the subject. The second grammatical error is detected in the second paragraph, the word. In the Arabic language since we are talking about two persons that means, but the translator disregarded this matter since in English there is no grammar base called “dual”, unlike the Arabic language. Therefore it should have been translated in accordance with Arabic language conventions. The third grammatical error is detected in the second paragraph. Since AL WAFI is translating word-for-word, it has disregarded the “duality” in Arabic language and translate it according to what appears before it in the context “they”, but “they” in this context refers to the president and the king, that should have been translated in accordance with the Arabic language conventions.
The third type of errors detected is textual errors. the first error is detected in the first paragraph and associated with its obvious in the English text that “three days visit” is a visit will remain for three days. But in Arabic, it should have been explicit to comply with the Arabic language. The second textual error is detected in the second paragraph. The translator machine has started the paragraph without being linked with the first paragraph, where it should have been linked to the first one because of its a journalistic text. A cohesive device must take place in the initial of the paragraph to make the text read more smoothly. In the Arabic language, there must be more exploitation that should take place to make the texts always read as natural texts and can be understandable.
Briefly, The target language text (TLT) is weak. a lot of errors detected in the translated text, and the translation machine opted the word-for-word translation, disregarded the Arabic language conventions. Therefore it reads like a foreign text and does not flow smoothly. There are several matters that Must be taken into account to make the text has a natural feel’.
