Counseling Self-Awareness

Funnily enough, doctors seem to be difficult patients. Some of them know that smoking is dangerous to their health yet they smoke nonetheless. The same is true with counselors. They seem to understand a lot of the problems of their patients and the people who ask advice from them. Yet, when it comes to their own issues and their own problems, they do not seem to be effective in following the very same advice that they would give to their clients if asked about the same problem. Counselors also have their own issues and their own personal problems. It may be some baggage from the past or some unresolved personal issues.

Some of these issues may interfere with the way that counselors do their job. It would be very important therefore for counselors to be aware of themselves and their own issues if they were to become effective in dealing with themselves and their own issues so that they can prevent these issues from affecting their views on the issues being presented by their clients. Personal Assessment: Strengths I have my own strengths and my weaknesses. I recognize the importance of identifying these so that I can effectively deal with my clients and the advice and resolution that I can provide my clients would be effective.

Objectivity in any situation is difficult to achieve most of the time. Emotions can cloud up the situation as well as the vested interests and even monetary considerations of people. Setting aside some of these considerations is a practice I have achieved over the past few years of training and practicing as a counselor. Even when I was a child, I already displayed a certain level of objectivity in my dealings with my playmates and my family. Objectivity, no matter what postmodernists and other critics may claim, is achievable up to a certain degree, although it cannot be done completely. I consider this as one of my strengths as a counselor.

In the course of my counseling practice, I would encounter people with different lifestyle choices and different views from those that I espouse. If I allow myself to be affected by such views I would not be an effective counselor. Yet, if I am able to practice objectivity, I can analyze my clients’ situation and predicaments from their own points of view and try to present solutions that are workable and acceptable to my clients. Another strength that I have when it comes to dealing with the counseling profession is my ability to separate my own principles and my own views from that of my clients.

I know that I am not able to accomplish this perfectly yet I can set aside my prejudices and my biases. In this regard, I sometimes feel like a priest behind the confessional, unable to see the counselee but can hear him or her perfectly and deal with the issues at hand. Although different schools of thought may differ in their views regarding empathizing and showing excessive emotions to counselees, I can also keep a very tight rein with my emotions if needed. Likewise, I can also show emotions sympathizing with the client if I feel that this is needed by the client.

I am careful, however, in dealing with persons from the opposite sex, especially in regards to emotions because of the awkward situations that it may engender. As a counselor, I want to avoid complications as it would be very difficult to be involved in such cases. When dealing with the opposite sex, I have created a set of rules for myself, which have helped me in my practice and in avoiding difficult situations that are difficult to get away from. Such set of rules is therefore very important for me and I consider this as my strength. Personal Assessment: My Weaknesses

There are some disappointments that I think I haven’t gotten over yet. When I was younger, I wanted to become a medical doctor and study at John Hopkins. However, due to financial constraints and some complications in my own academic performance, I did not manage to achieve this. Yet, I have completed the requirements of Psychology and became a counselor instead. When I look back at this dream, I still remember the regret and the disappointment I had when I discovered that I did not make it to John Hopkins. The disappointment has faded yet the pangs of regret and pain are still there.

It seems that I also need to spend some time in order to finally get over this. In addition to this, I also have some baggage because of my relationship with my dad. I was not really close to my dad when I was growing up. He was conservative and too much of a disciplinarian for me to be close to him. As such, when I was younger, I both loved him and hated him at the same time. During the times that I felt that I hated him, I also felt guilty because I knew that I should not be feeling that way because he is my dad. Yet, I could not help it.

The feelings were intense. Deep inside my heart, the anger developed because of what looked to me like neglect and his improper treatment of me and my mom. Surprisingly though, my younger sibling got a better kind of treatment from him. It seems he changed later in life. The anger and the pain, however, were etched deep within me and I might also need some time in order to sort through my emotions and deal with them. Thankfully, during the times that I talked with my mother, we managed to discuss our negative emotions and somehow managed to forgive my dad.

It comes as no surprise though that I also have some unmet needs. In order for me to deal with these unmet needs, I usually write or if I could not write, I call my best friend and talk about my issues. My friend has been very faithful in listening to me. Although he is not a professional counselor as I am, he is nonetheless showing me some of the principles that I follow. When I am faced with my own problems I tend to scribble notes and brainstorm on paper the best course of action that I have to take.

Sometimes, I do this with my clients and some of them have been taken aback when they saw me doing it. So I have had to restrain myself on several occasions on doing such. When I can no longer restrain myself though, I ask my client if it is okay to take down notes and scribble on my paper while he or she is talking. I have also received varied response to this. I tend to follow the same process in dealing with the problems of other people. That is why, I always have a handy notebook to help me deal with different problems. Conclusion

In my meetings with my counselees, I could not help but learn from them too. Whenever I listen to problems and discover that such problems echo my own, I tend to keep a check on myself and avoid dwelling on my own problems. If I do, I might get lost with my client’s own problem and that would create a problem with me. Thus, I tend to check myself every now and then. I have also written a note to myself in my own notebook to constantly remind me of the need to focus on my clients’ problems. Whenever I enter my office, I enter the professional sphere and I leave my personal issues behind.