Academic History

I am currently enrolled in the Business School at Villanova University. My academic standing is good and I have maintained a grade point average of 3.62. I believe I am stable and the change I wish to make in my choice of universities is based on logic and not a whim. I have not transferred before, so this will be a first.

My university experience has not had any significant breaks; it flows in an unbroken line from my initial enrollment to the present time. I suffered a few hiccoughs alone the way, but I have persevered, and I managed to rise from the bottom of my seventh year class in Shanghai to the rank of number one in ESL.

I was in an alien environment and it was no small matter to adapt to the different culture I found in Shanghai. Despite my lack of height I managed to excel in varsity basketball as well. I think it is worth noting that I am not a native English speaker, but I took my deficiency in the language as a challenge and managed to thrive. I am proud of the fact that I quickly moved from ESL to 1B Class in the British system, which is equivalent to AP.

I am steadfast in my resolve and I have not changed career paths. I have found that there is a lack of cultural diversity at Villanova. I initially did not realize the lack was so profound. I had erroneously assumed that matters would balance themselves and I would find there was more diversity than I first saw.

This proved not to be the case, however. I believe that the university experience is not one-dimensional. I think a university education is only complete when the student is rounded into a productive member of society instead of just being grounded in the basics of his or her major.

I was once accepted at the University of Washington, and I have every hope that the university will look favorably on my application once more, permitting me to correct and allowing me to attend the University of Washington as I should have done in the first place.

 Major and Career Goals:

It is my intention to major in Finance. I believe that the university is home to one of the best and most extensive business programs in the United States. I am Taiwanese by birth and spent most of my life in Shanghai, which has a reputation as being the future “Finance Center” for all of Asia.

Early on I came to realize the importance of knowledge in financial dealings, with money management being particularly important.  I spent my high school years in pursuit of learning all I could on the subject of economics, calculus and other math related subjects. Business is the life-blood of my country’s economy.

I am savvy enough to understand that capital is the engine that drives business. It is as the old Chinese proverb says, “Money is not everything, but without money nothing can be done.” But I also realize that money alone is not enough. Having funding is only the first step toward a successful business. The entrepreneur must have the knowledge and associated skills to handle turning a profit and ensuring that the business operations run smoothly.

Money management is the second part of the equation in producing success. I believe that a degree from the University of Washington will go far toward ensuring that I will have this knowledge and the necessary skills. I have expectations that a degree from your university’s Finance program will benefit me greatly as I scale the corporate ladder.

Further, I believe that a University of Washington education will help me fulfill my avowed goal of becoming a specialist in investment analysis. My intention is to become an investment or business analyst in the United States, with an eye toward the Wall Street Journal. I have a fervent believe that I can attain this dream if I am blessed and fortunate enough to be accepted at the University of Washington.

Cultural Understanding:

The University of Washington is culturally diverse, and being Taiwanese, I am acutely aware of how important that can be for a student, irrespective of his area of study. I look forward to the healthy interaction and social intercourse that will avail itself to me in the richer milieu of this university.

I look forward to the exchange of ideas and the broadening effect that intercultural communication can bring. In essence I look forward to being able to share my culture and I look forward to the learning experience I will receive from the various cultures of my fellow students.

I fully expect the school to pave the path which I will follow as I experience personal growth on the road to my ultimate goals. It is not a capricious decision, I have carefully studied my options and have chosen what I believe to be the most advantageous avenue for me.

When considering the reputation which the university enjoys I feel confident that my acceptance into the business program will furnish me with the needed tools to accomplish my goal in this life. I expect to become a highly competent business analyst, but more, I expect to become a productive citizen, replete with the values that will enhance the fulfillment of my aspirations.

I expect to become a valued alumnus, having been enriched by the university experience. This growth in personal values and mores is important to my sense of self worth, and will make me a more valuable member of society.

It is my belief that the true excellence of any institution of higher learning lies in its ability to educate the whole person. A school becomes truly excellent by excelling in the programs that it offers as well as the values it inculcates in its students, which is how I see the University of Washington.

Writing Quality

Grammar mistakes

F (50%)

Synonyms

A (98%)

Redundant words

F (42%)

Originality

91%

Readability

F (52%)

Total mark

D

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